This month a certain popular magazine are giving away the exciting new mascara from a very popular beauty brand. So like many others out there I rushed to my nearest supermarket to buy one. Only to find that clearly a lot of people had got there before me and there were none left. (I was highly upset) However, luckily for me, the newsagents in Gatwick Airport/Train Station are a little bit less busy so I managed to get my grubby little mitts on a copy.
Dear God, reading it made me remember why I NEVER buy this terrible, inconsistent, utter trash.
Now, don’t get me wrong, and serious apologies to the people who contribute to this magazine, this is nothing personal to the brand, the people involved in making it etc etc, (Hence the reason I am not naming names) I am sure there are hundreds of other magazines out there that are doing / writing the same sort of
I just honestly, cannot believe that on a monthly basis people actually shell out nearly FIVE of their hard earned English Pound Sterling (or whatever currency you earn your money in) in exchange for this horrificness.
So, let me explain,
Front Page Fold Out – Page 105: – Aside a contents page, and a few (for want of a better word) credits pages – these pages are ALL adverts. That’s pretty much 100 pages of adverts. Don’t get me wrong, I understand these brands have to make money, and printing etc costs more than sales are going to bring in. But seriously, 100 pages of adverts before I even get to anything remotely resembling content. Is it just me that thinks that a little TOO much?!?
Page 133 – So we’ve gone through more adverts, two very, very brief barely even half a page interviews with people who are probably more interesting than the column space than they get, more adverts, horoscopes, and yet again more adverts, we get to this months ‘Wardrobe Essentials’.
I am into fashion as much as the next girl, I love a good on-trend look. But firstly, I feel fashion wouldn’t be fashion if everyone just wore what they saw in these magazines instead of trying something ‘out there’ every now and then. Secondly, I think if i bought all these things that are deemed ‘Essential’ it would probably cost me a good £10,000. And that’s just this month!
Page 171 – Again we’ve gone through MORE adverts, and a few peoples ‘perfect wardrobes – (because although we all need the same essentials it makes sense for two completely different people to have the perfect wardrobe?) to an article that makes me irrationally angry. In summary, ‘Fashion is getting slutty again because men say they like it’ And they wonder why I don’t want to bring children into a world where it’s acceptable to publish and send this terrible message out to millions of people…
Page 220-224 – So after several adverts (surprise, surprise), nicely juxtaposed by a few more ladies ‘perfect’ wardrobes; we get to a refreshingly sensible piece of content. A biography of a lady who is an entrepreneur, is doing what she wants to do, and has made a highly successful career of doing so, and who does it without being a ‘celebrity’.
Am I wrong to feel like by page two-hundred and something I should of enjoyed more than 4 pages of decent writing?
Pages 226-228 – An article about ‘Books you should read if you want to be Smart’. Last time I checked reading was for enjoyment? Or was I wrong and now it’s just another thing that needs to be about image and who see’s you doing it?
Page 230-312 – A nice chunk containing a glaringly over sexualised review of ‘The Skirt Club’ which left me undecided as to whether they’re saying that it’s alright to have a sexual fling with another female (because well, DUH! Have sex with who you want…you know as long as you’re not hurting anyone else) or if they’re accentuating the fact that all men have fantasies about their girl on another girl and that women should play up to that (don’t even get me started…). Then another chunk of an interview with a “good-looking” male actor who we are told it’s alright to still find attractive even though he is ageing. You know, because I needed confirmation of who I fins attractive and who I don’t.
Sorry, forgot to let you know that they hastily squeeze in a whole two pages of getting your own feminist voice heard between those two (such important) things. The word irony springs to mind.
Page 313-331 – Now we go into a bit of Marketing horrificness. A celebrity promoting a charity. But not even in a subtle way. The first few pages are a ‘genuine’ interview, softening us readers up in a ‘She’s just like us, shes such a nice person’ rubbish. Just for a few pages later to completely switch to how the charity she is promoting is selling T-Shirts. And how you should buy one. Of course, that’s only if you’re not catastropically overdrawn from buying all those ‘fashion essentials’ they deemed important enough to put at the front of the magazine. After all the adverts for designer clothes….
Just a quick note, this isn’t me being a horrible person, I am all for promoting charities, however I do have a slight problem with being coerced by just dropping it into what I thought was a nice casual interview with a celebrity.
Until the end – Endless, endless adverts.
I think the bottom line is, that I can’t get over how people genuinely pay every month, for this amount of advertising, anti-feminist articles, and just genuine commercialism. But hey! At least I got a nice mascara out of it!
Let me know you’re thoughts guys – and feel free to be honest if you think I’m being overly grumpy, or too harsh.